Hello Lady writes…

Hey thanks for the response and the prayer. It touched me the last few paragraphs. I over read my first posting and i realised what i was meant to say was that i felt shamed preaching as a drunk because i knew that it was bad image towards christianity. I have a “little sister” in christ. Before i turn towards these bad habbits i was straight tight with the lord, trusted him, close relationship and everything. I had 2 diaries which i ripped up when i got angry lol that were full of the things i learnt while on a journey with god, lets say a journey to TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT, cause when the hard times came i was afraid of confrontation and now i live in shame and fear of my sin and how i’ve hurt people. I let my weaknesses take over me and i just came out of hospital last month after becoming demon sick LOL whatta test !

And the when i first met my lil sister in christ it was when i made a mistake in my life ( but i learnt how god blesses us through our mistakes ) and he gave me this lil sister shes about my age just a year or two younger . When i talk to her about god i could feel the passion i would go on and on and on and i was able to hear gods voice clearly and tell her what he tells me.

Somehow after i came out of being “sick” i forgot the lords voice and confused them with other voices i hear nowadays inside of my heart. She was my inspiration drawing closer to god. Now eversince i’ve been afraid and scared i just RUN for my life spiritually and i try to avoid the areas in my life where i KNOW i have to WALK THROUGH .the main area is THE PAST, i know i have to deal with it and god wants me to hurry up and deal with the mess so i can move on but im so afraid of the people of what they will do so just like JOnah im running lol

Anyways straight to the point when i talk to her about god now we have nothing to say, i do my best sometimes to speak of knowledge but the past is kind of linked to her and i kind help to think of all the people im afraid of. I would only consider myself a “part-time” christian these days or if i do something like drink i try to leave god out of it. Because i know how hypocritical it is to be seen in such a bad image. But i can’t help but preach everytime I’m drunk, it’s a passion that still burns down inside of me and i know it’s the worst example of a christian to show others that i’m preaching through drunkeness but i just can’t help it .

Well i pray that god watches over you and blesses you for helping and thanks for listening :). I’ve lost alot recently but its people like you who make our days better

Take care

Beloved By Him replies…

Dear friend,

I think you really need to allow yourself to embrace the fact that when we are in Christ, we are a new creation, the old has gone, and the new has come (II Cor. 5:17). The enemy—our flesh, the devil, and the world—will always try to get us to feel disqualified by tempting us to sin and condemning us when we do. But the truth is that we are sanctified once for all by Jesus Christ (Heb. 10:10). What God has done for us in Christ can never be undone (Is. 43:13). In Him, we have been called into the light, into a completely new life (Col. 1:12-14). Colossians 1:21-22 puts it this way, “And you, who once were alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now He has reconciled in the body of His flesh through death, to present you holy, and blameless, and above reproach in His sight.” That’s truly how God sees us. Someone explained it to me once like this: it’s like we are in God’s presence, wearing our “Jesus skin.” God can’t see us for anything less than righteous, because we are permanently complete in Him (Col. 2:10). There is nothing we can do that will change God’s love and acceptance of us, because it’s not based on our behavior or our talents or our failings, but only the righteousness of Christ Jesus (Ps. 71:16, II Cor. 5:21). The minute we start thinking that we can have any better standing in God’s sight because of what we do or don’t do, we err and change our foundation from faith in Him to works by us.

If the enemy can keep us thinking that we are unworthy of God’s call on our life, then we will stay in bondage to shame and we won’t be able to walk in the mission that God has for each of us. So we have to cling to one of the most powerful scriptures in the New Testament, Romans 8:1, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, who walk in the Spirit, and do not fulfill the lust of the flesh.” NO condemnation. None. Because we are in Christ, we are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit of God (Rom. 8:5-11). Our body of flesh is dead, and it can’t fulfill its desire to be God’s enemy and send us to hell in our sins. That war is over in Christ. Jesus might have looked like He was losing when He was on the cross, but He was actually winning the greatest battle: “And you, being dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He has made alive together with Him, having forgiven you all trespasses, having wiped out the handwriting of requirements that was against us, which was contrary to us. And He has taken it out of the way, having nailed it to the cross. Having disarmed principalities and powers, He made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them in it.” (Col. 2:13-15) Your sins are gone, covered by the blood of Christ. Whatever shame you would have carried because of them, Jesus already took to the cross (Heb. 12:2). To be consumed with shame is to not understand or appreciate what Jesus did for us by dying for our sins and giving us His righteousness. Shame is a temporary battle of fear and pride that doesn’t need to keep us from our true victory in Christ.

When we are oppressed with shame, we need to claim the truth of God’s word—we are the righteousness of Christ. Our sins are forgiven, and God is going to complete the good work He began in us until the day we see Jesus face to face (Phil. 1:8, I Thess. 5:24). God knew every sin we would ever have, and He loved us anyways, provided atonement for it through Christ, and still wants us to serve Him on earth and be with Him in eternity. It’s our choice whether we will accept this amazing gift, pressing forward despite the feelings of shame and unworthiness, knowing that God has not disqualified us. If we willfully choose to sin, we can temporarily disqualify ourselves from the earthly privilege of serving God and giving Him glory. But He still loves us, and we’re still going to heaven. We’ve just wasted our time, talents, and resources and made ourselves miserable in the process.

My heart goes out to you. I know what it’s like to feel like you’re feeling. I spent a good portion of my life telling others how much they needed Jesus, while I lived a life that was self-serving, sinful, and controlled by the fear of being discovered for who I really was. Almost nine years after God radically changed my life, I still struggle with sin and feelings of unworthiness, but I have to choose to believe that God knew what He was doing when He created His plan for my life. I could let my feelings lead me away from God’s will, but I have to remind myself that I know where that road ends, and it’s not pretty—it’s pretty ugly.

When we continually try to outrun or ignore God, His will, and His unchangeable truths, we will wear ourselves out until we are only a shell of a human being, both physically and spiritually. There is a very strong correlation between spiritual well-being and physical health (Prov. 18:14). That’s why my life verse is 3 John 2, “Beloved, I pray that in all things you would prosper and be in good health, even as your soul prospers.” When I am spiritually sound, grounded in the Word, and living at peace with God’s will for my life, I hardly get sick at all. But when I’m at odds with God, trying to do things in my own way and time, not trusting, seeking, or relying on Him, I have wound up really sick and even hospitalized by illnesses and depression that were brought on by overwork, too much stress, and self-destructive behavior.

Don’t be like Jonah. We don’t have to imprison ourselves in the belly of the fish because of our refusal to trust and obey God. Stop running and turn to your Savior. You will find forgiveness and true freedom from shame. You can learn how to have a godly guilt that leads to repentance and a desire to never go back to where you’ve been (II Cor. 7:9-11). Nothing needs to keep you from Christ. Remember, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment.” (I John 4:18) Don’t let the enemy torment you anymore. Run into the loving arms of Christ, because the truth is that nothing can separate you from His love (Rom. 8:38-39). I pray the that the Holy Spirit right now will open the eyes of your heart, so you can see the truth of God’s love, mercy, and grace toward you, in Jesus’ name. We love you, sister.

Much love,

Beloved by Him

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