Born This Way: My Journey From Sexual immorality To Total Deliverance
February 9, 2016 – 9:57 am | 2 Comments

(Note to readers: Contains graphic content.)
By LC
Until now, I have never confessed my greatest secret to anyone. For more than 25 years, I firmly kept hidden the one thing about me that could change the …

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Home » Aimee-Beloved by Him, Answered by Beloved by Him, Meet the Women of WeUsed2bu, Testimonies-Share Your God Story Now!

Beloved by Him

Submitted by on January 6, 2009 – 7:38 pm4 Comments

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Hello, I’m Aimee, also known as Beloved by Him. I chose this name for several reasons: Because my name means “beloved”, because my husband and I are each other’s beloved, and because God works in and through me to bring the counsel of His word to other people–He‘s the real author of my work. But it took the first thirty years of my life for me to really surrender to God, and another six to finally put feet to my faith. Now I’m 43, and I am still amazed at how faithful He is to love and bless me regardless of the mistakes in my past, present, or future. He knows everything about me, and loves me anyway!

That’s a real miracle, considering the person I used to be. I was emotionally scarred by my natural father, who abused drugs, alcohol, my mother, me, and other members of my family. After he and my mother divorced when I was six, I spent years going back and forth between two extremes: Living with my mother and stepfather, with very little money and under very strict rules and discipline, and visiting my father, who was loaded, both financially and with drugs and booze. When we were at his house, I was a parent to my brothers as he partied first with my stepmother, and once she left him because of the abuse, a line of women who took her place. By the time the court stepped in to order supervised visitation, the damage was done. The last time I spoke to my father, I was nineteen and pregnant, and I knew that he could never be around my child.

I had already been abusing alcohol and pot for years by that time. Much of my last two years of high school were spent partying, sneaking out, and fighting constantly with my parents. The day after I graduated, I moved out of my home and into a friend’s house, where they lived a drugging lifestyle. I spent the next several months living off my friends, until one day, I met the man who would become my husband and the father of my children. The Lord in His great grace pulled me out of where I was living, put me with this good man, and eventually brought us both to Himself–me as I recommitted my life (I had gotten saved when I was seven), and him for the first time. I had my second child at 20, a third at 24, and things improved, except that I never truly confessed to the Lord or shared with my husband many of my past sins, or that I was still consumed with the bulimia that had begun for me in middle school. Instead of those behaviors and mindsets just going away, they began to control my life, and by the time I was 30, I had thrown my marriage, and my life, away. After suffering a nervous breakdown, I had to truly repent and cry out to God to save me, and then choose to cling to Him and His plan for my life. The only other alternative was to let myself die. Praise Jesus, I chose life. I remember the night I was on my knees, in His presence, and said, “Ok, God, I’ll do it your way.” It was the best decision I ever made.

Coming out of that dark time was not easy. I spent months in what I call my “harvest of horrors”, as years of denied behavior surfaced and had to be confessed and repented of. During that time, the Lord truly gave my husband “amazing grace” and mercy for me, as he forgave me and allowed the Lord to redeem our marriage. In the years since, I have watched as God has made our marriage into something more special than I ever could have hoped to be a part of. Through Jesus Christ, we as a couple have “become as a wonder to many” (Ps. 71:7), and He continues to draw us closer to Him and to each other. We attended Calvary Chapel Fort Lauderdale, which was a great place for us, because of our different backgrounds (I was raised Presbyterian and then charismatic, and he is a Messianic Jew.) I also have a wonderful stepfather with an incredible testimony and an amazing walk with the Lord, and a huge extended family that I love dearly.

My life is blessed, but it’s not perfect. I had a second bout with depression, and I still struggle with anxiety. I am filled with the Word, but my flesh seems to revel in trying to make me ineffective by attacking me with doubt, shame, and fear. But I stand firmly on the Rock of my life, Jesus Christ. He is my salvation, my fortress, my strong tower, and His banner over me is love. I am still learning to believe and trust in that love, which “for the joy set before Him, (He) endured the cross, despising the shame” (Heb. 12:2), so that He could forgive my sins and spend eternity with me. There is nothing more I could ever ask for Him to do to prove to me that I am Beloved by Him.

“But God forbid that I should boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by Whom the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world.” Galatians 6:14

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4 Comments »

  • Hello Anonymous: Thank you so much for writing into our site for advice. I am Precious in His Sight and I will be answering your question on behalf of Beloved by Him. I must say that your question is a bit challenging and it is something I’ve never thought about, even in this hard economy that we are facing. There isn’t a particular scripture in the bible that specifically talks about selling your eggs, but I do want to share a story from the bible with you.
    It is the life of Sarai (Sarah), Abram’s (Abraham) wife. God had spoken to Abram and made him a covenant (promise). God told Abram to look up in the sky and count the many stars and that amount, which he was unable to count, would be the amount of descendants Abram would have.
    Genesis 15:5-Then the Lord brought Abram outside beneath the night sky and told him, “Look up into the heavens and count the stars if you can. Your descendants will be like that, too many to count!”
    So Sarai, I guess was feeling as though God was taking too long to bless them with a child, so she decided to take matters into her own hands and give her maid to her husband to sleep with him and have a baby. She didn’t want to rely on the plan that the Lord had for her, so wanted things to be done her way.
    Genesis 16:1-2 – But Sarai, Abram’s wife, had no children. So Sarai took her servant, an Egyptian woman named Hagar, and gave her to Abram so she could bear his children. “The Lord has kept me from having any children,” Sarai said to Abram. “Go and sleep with my servant. Perhaps I can have children through her.” And Abram agreed.
    Sarai had that “Microwave Mentality” that we all seem to have these days. We want things done our way and we want it done RIGHT NOW!!!
    Now, I don’t know anywhere in the bible that specifically says anything about “selling your eggs”, but I can tell you this, God has a specific plan for your life, and that plan is to prosper you and give you hope and a good future, Jeremiah 29:11.
    God instructs us in the very beginning of the bible to be fruitful, multiply and fill the earth: Genesis 1:28 – God blessed them and told them, “Multiply and fill the earth and subdue it. Be masters over the fish and birds and all the animals.”
    The bible also tells us that children are a reward from the Lord; Psalm 127:3 – Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
    My dear, I know that our economy is bad and we are facing a lot of challenges financially, we all are! But this is where hope, faith and trust in God kicks in. If you call yourself a believer and a follower of Christ, then you have to follow and believe His word that tells us that; And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19
    We have to trust and believe that even though the world is going through a recession, we are Kingdom kids and our Father will not see us suffer and He will always take care of us.
    I know that you said you are twenty years old and you can make your own decisions, I just strongly advise you to pray hard about this decision of selling your eggs. Let’s really think about this; isn’t this like a “get rich quick” plan? A plan, that you can get money from right away? You said that you will only do it one time, what happens when you go through another dry spell financially? What else of yourself will you want to sell? Or let’s think about it this way your eggs will eventually turn into babies, and biologically you will be the mommy to these babies. Now what if, just speaking hypothetically and keeping it truly one hundred percent real with you…. You sell off some of your eggs and one or two or even three of them are used and reproduce, and then a few years from now you fall in love get married and have babies of your own. Your son/daughter grows up and they meet someone special and fall in love. What if that someone that he or she meets is actually their biological brother or sister?
    Wow, what would be the chances of that?
    Hmmmm……
    Just something that I feel you should really think about before you sign your name on the dotted line to sell your eggs.
    My dear beautiful sweet twenty year old, don’t fall into the enemy’s snare of creating a plan for your life. Don’t be impatient like Sarai who couldn’t wait for God’s promise to come to life for her and Abram.
    If you read all of Sarai’s story, you will see that even before the baby arrived she regretted the decision that she made to bring her maid together with her husband.
    Genesis 16:4:-6 – So Abram slept with Hagar, and she became pregnant. When Hagar knew she was pregnant, she began to treat her mistress Sarai with contempt. Then Sarai said to Abram, “Its all your fault! Now this servant of mine is pregnant, and she despises me, though I myself gave her the privilege of sleeping with you. The Lord will make you pay for doing this to me!” Abram replied, “Since she is your servant, you may deal with her as you see fit.” So Sarai treated her harshly, and Hagar ran away.
    Do not behave like Sarai, sit back and wait on the Lord and watch Him perform miracle after miracle in your life because of your obedience. Let God take care of you according to His will for your life, pray and let Him show you how to manage during this recession that we are in. He will because He promises to never leave or forsake you (Hebrew 13:5), neither are Your thoughts the same as ours and His word is always true and never goes out void.
    Isaiah 55:8,11 – “My thoughts are completely different from yours,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.” It is the same with my word. I send it out, and it always produces fruit. It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.

    Be blessed,
    Precious in His Sight

  • anonymous says:

    I want to sell my eggs. We are in a rescission and the economy is very bad. I only plan on selling my eggs once. I’m 20 years old,so I’m old enough to make my own decisions. Some people say it’s like playing God but I don’t see it that way. I would like to know what you think and what the Bible says about that?

  • Beloved by Him says:

    Thanks so much for your comment, Alana. God continues to be so faithful in my life, and He is in yours, too. May He bless you with His perfect peace–may it guard your heart and mind as you rest and trust in Him :) Ps/do you have a testimony you want to share? Pray about submitting it under the “Testify to Love” category…as the Lord leads. Thanks again for writing!

  • Alana says:

    This is so beautiful :) God bless you that you got out of those situations. Its so inspiring. 😀

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