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Home » Answered By Trophy of Grace, Hot Topics, Recent Questions & Answers

“That’s Just Me, I’m Dark”

Submitted by on June 6, 2009 – 12:01 pm12 Comments

Teen Leader writes…

I have a teenager, (a girl), in my class who writes poems about darkness. I’m worried about her. She claims to be a Christian. I believe she is. I just think she thinks a lot even if it’s about other people who she knows are hurting and then writes about them. She doesn’t seem depressed at all (in person) When I ask her about the “dark” things she writes, she says “that’s just me, I’m dark.” emo-girlWhy would she want to be if she’s truly a believer? Isn’t there a way she can write about the hurt and their need for healing without sounding like she’s the one feeling it? Maybe she has before, I don’t know. We’re not extremely close friends, just teacher and student close type friends but we both show we care a lot for each other (as I do with all “my kids”) and I’m older than her so I don’t want to sound superior but I do want to help. I’m praying for her and then I also found your web site and these verses you referred to someone in a different yet similar situation (the dark part). What are your thoughts and advice? Thanks so much.

Signed “Teen Leader”.

Ephesians 5:11 which says, “Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.”

If you are a Christian then the answer is clear. We are to take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness. We are children of light who are called to separate ourselves from indecency. We don’t belong to darkness and night and that’s usually when all the parties go down. (1 Thessalonians 5:4-8)

Trophy of Grace replies…

Dear Teen Leader,

May our Lord bless you for seeking helping in carrying this young sister’s burden. I believe you are a tool in our Lord’s hands that He is using to help reach this young lady. May He give me the words that will help you.

I would talk to her about her gift that she seems to have to see what others maybe going through. If the Lord has given her the ability to see when others are suffering then it is most certainly for her to stand in the gap for them. If she is going to write the dark things that she sees that others are suffering then perhaps she can then turn around the darkness by shining the Light of God’s Word on the situation. How?

Well… she can write prayers over them. She can write the scriptures that come into her heart for them. Then if she feels lead to she can share with them her prayers, or she can just give them the scriptures that our Lord lays on heart.

Let her know that she is not dark. She is a child of God called to live in the light. He wants her to let her light shine for all the world to see. He wants to use her in a mighty way if she will turn her gift over to Him so that He can teach her how to use it to glorify the Kingdom of God and Jesus Christ.

“You are the world’s light-a city on a hill, glowing in the night for all to see. Don’t hide your light! Let it shine for all; let your good deeds glow for all to see, so that they will praise your heavenly Father.” –  Matthew 5:14-16 hands

Keep praying and interceding for her. Often times this is the primary way that we can help someone, especially those who do not want to receive the Word the Lord is speaking through us. Be diligent in your prayers for her. Ask the Lord to give her confirmation of what He is trying to show her so that she will be without excuse and so that she will be confident that it is truly Him that is giving her this direction.

May the Lord keep you encouraged as you chose to stand in the gap for this young sister. We will be praying and interceding for both of you. We love you sister and keep up the good work so one day you will hear our Lord say to you..”Well done good and faithful servant.”

Blessings to you in Christ Jesus name..

Sincerely,

Trophy of Grace

12 Comments »

  • admin says:

    He’s young. Perhaps he’s just shy. Just ask him :) Sometimes people just need to talk and know that someone else is listening. Listen to him if he wants to talk and always pray for him :)

  • Hannah says:

    My Friend is a little younger then me and he might turn emo he doesn’t talk much and he has long hair or…He might just be Embarrassed that he has a girl as a friend it kinda hurts but i don’t show it i hope it’s just a fase because when we’re around just eack other or around our family he talk more but when it’s just us he talks more we have known each other since we when babies he used to be wild when he was little but now he’s more reserved except when we are in the pool then he thinks he rules it Haha.He is in public school and i’m homeschool (and yes i have friends)
    Does anyone know what this means is he in a fase do you think he might have a crush on me? or something else?
    he has a little brother and a older sister his little brother has 3 things wrong with him and he has tubes in him and i think he gets much attention.

  • Hello,

    Thanks for stopping by and for leaving your comment. I think that it is wonderful that so many sisters, like you, are concerned for this girl.

    I agree that we should never be judgemental, and I think that all of the responses so far would agree with that. We only see the outward appearance of this girl, but God sees her heart (1 Samuel 16:7). However, when we see any signs that anyone (especially a Christian brother or sister) is hurting, it is our proper reaction to have compassion and concern for them (Colossians 3:12, Galatians 6:2). Is this sister hurting? Is there something that she needs to talk about with a friend?

    I think that it shows great love that this girl is concerned for other people and has a compassionate heart to those who are hurting around her. However, it could be dangerous for a person to internalize the hurts of others to the point that it causes great sadness in our own lives. I do not know this girl, but if she is a believer in Jesus Christ, she has a wonderful opportunity to share with others the great news of the freedom they can find only in Him. Perhaps she has the gift of a compassionate and understanding heart. Right now, she is using this gift to write about her feelings. As Christians, I think that we should also always look for opportunities to be the hands, feet, and eyes of Christ. Could she encourage someone else that is hurting? Could she use her writing in a way that would minister to someone who is hurting? Perhaps there is an opportunity here especially for her, that could be pointed out by the ‘teen leader’ that originally wrote in.

    Thank you for caring about this girl. I don’t think at all that we should “pick on her”, but I don’t think that we should ignore this girl either, in case she is hurting. Whatever reaction we have, we should always do it in love for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).

    in His precious, unfailing love,
    Heart of Worship

  • liz says:

    you people are so judgemental.leave the girl alone and let her be who she wants to be.pleaseeee leave her alobe.leave her alone.leave her alone.i cant handle it anymore.leave her alone

  • Thanks for stopping by and leaving your comment. Your right sister emo is a trend. However it is a dark and negative trend that is influencing young people all over the United States. It promotes and is associated with anti-social behavior, social withdrawal, self-injury (cutting), and even suicide.
    As Christians we know that we need to be wise with what trends, traditions, and customs we pick up and follow in this world. In fact our Lord has actually warned us NOT to copy the behavior and customs of this world.
    Romans 12:2 “DO NOT BE CONFORMED TO THIS WORLD (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].” (Amplified)
    Conforming means..
    1)To correspond in form or character; be similar.
    2) To act or be in accord or agreement; comply
    3) To act in accordance with current customs or modes
    The images on the internet when you google ‘emo’ or ‘emo love’ are so disturbing, depressing, and dark. For children of light to associate themselves with such a demonic fad is dangerous and unwise.
    As Christians we are not to allow our minds to be filled with dark and evil thoughts of hurting ourselves or others. We are called to stay away from unproductive works of darkness and instead expose them for what they are.
    “Don’t participate in the things these people do. For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light! For this light within you produces only what is good and right and true. Carefully determine what pleases the Lord. Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.” Ephesians 5:7-11

    The dark trends of emo and gothic do not reflect or represent anything good. When Christians get sucked in and influenced by dark and negative trends, going with the flow of this world, they are headed down a dangerous broad road. It is our responsibility to warn each other when we see that one of us is headed down the wrong path, ignoring the voice of the Lord, hardening their hearts, and compromising their faith and testimony. This is true love to be willing to see that someone needs help and to open your mouth and speak the Truth in love.

    Thanks again for your comment.

    Sincerely,

    Trophy of Grace

  • HasAnEducation says:

    emo is just a trend that teens think is “cool” to be. I’m positive she’s just going with the trend. Besides, most things adults are told about emo on the internet or through people are untrue and are used as scare tactics to a major extent, or are told by people who are uneducated about the sub-culture. Basically, it’s just a trend, a fad, and she’ll grow out of it soon, it’s nothing to be worried about.
    Even if she isn’t emo and is “gothic” or belonging to another culture, just leave her be, she should have the choice to do and believe what she wants to. She doesn’t need help :)

  • admin says:

    No, we don’t know her. We found the image on the web.

  • Anonymous says:

    hi
    i have a guestion! do you know this girl an the picture really? ( i mean the em girl which is right of the test about emos) please answered! i need this for my project in art lessons!
    if you knem here please ask her about i can take this picture for my project?!
    bye bye ^^

  • Thanks for stopping by and sharing your comment…

    I am becoming more and more concerned regarding this whole emo, gothic, and Christians being dark thing. There is a great deception being fed to our youth that this is ok for a Christian to be dark or represent darkness. We are not supposed to copy the behavior and customs of this world, which means following its foolish fads. (Romans 12:2)

    Ephesians 4:17-18 “With the Lord’s authority I say this: Live no longer as the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. 18 Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against Him.”

    The whole idea that Christians can be dark contradicts the Word of God. We are called to be the light in the darkness and to live in the light. We are supposed to imitate God in everything that we do because we are His dear children. We are children of light. Darkness and light don’t mix. You can not have both. Light will always extinguish the darkness in our life. It is not acceptable to the Lord to profess to be a Christian (follower of Christ) but live in darkness, both physically and spiritually. Our minds are supposed to be renewed not still meditating on darkness. (Ephesians 5:1)

    Ephesians 5:8-9 “ 6 Don’t be fooled by those who try to excuse these sins, for the anger of God will fall on all who disobey Him. 7 Don’t participate in the things these people do. 8 For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light! 9 For this light within you produces only what is good and right and true.”

    1 John 1:5-6 “This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in Him at all. 6 So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth.”

    I agree that no one should judge someone else’s way of expression; however, we need to encourage healthy expression. If someone is constantly writing dark or depressing things it could be a sign that they may need intervention from a professional. To not get them the help they need could lead to suicide.

    Thanks again for stopping by and sharing your comment.

    Be blessed sister. You are in our prayers…

    Sincerely,

    Trophy of Grace

  • sucide babe says:

    ok now people i belive tht you mean good but you can be dark and feel tht kind of pain and still be a christan im not one but i have a like bestest friend tht is and she is dark and writes like tht and a christan but she just feels the pain some people feel it some people dont im not saying tht you dont im just saying she is christan,,and writes about not such happy things no need to worry about her if you feel tht it is a problum to other students or the writeings are getting more and more painfull tlk to her about and see wats wrong if she says nothing tht means there is nothing wrong some people just need to write things down and get it out of their head so they won’t act on it and actually hurt themself but if they do dont judge just be there for her/him and dont send them off to therepy or the counceler cuz the counceler is just another word for say snitch/rat and they just tell your parents and tht sometimes ends to sucide

  • Thanks for your comment..

    That’s sad..but I can remember when I thought the world was hopeless. I later learned that life is hopeless if we put our hope in the world instead of Christ. When our hope is in Jesus we do not desire to be in darkness. We love the Light and desire to share the Light with all of the world, especially with those who have confined themselves in darkness. We want to bring hope to the hopeless and that is what this teen leader desires to do with this young lady.

  • jordan says:

    if you leave emo people alone, they wont bother you. they just think the world is hopeless though they wont express it. they hope to find happiness one day but for now its a hole of darkness

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